Ad: Quaker Puffed Cereals

1928 Quaker Puffed Cereals

Where do I begin with this ad?  In my searches around ebay and the internet I find gems such as these that just prove advertisers are insane.  We have an Alice in Wonderland theme but the premise of Alice in Wonderland must have changed since 1928.  Take the March Hare on the right, he's not just crazy, he's pissed!  I guess I would be too if I had to serve these rich little snot-rag brats their puffed rice and puffed wheat.  As a matter of fact Jr. on the left looks quite stuffed and puffed himself.  Notice how his head is tilted back, arms bracing himself on the chair?  Yes it's quite clear that another country is about to be heard from as Jr. lets off yet another stentorian belch after having consumed all the puffed grains the mad hatter could furnish him. 


I just love the wording in the text as well.  "All children adore these fairy grains".  Wait, what?  I thought we were talking about cereal not illegal drugs.  Or perhaps these cereals are gathered in Brahm Stoker's garden, yes fairy grains... of fairy poop?  Yes these cereals are exploded to 8 times their size, well Jr. is certainly there on both points.  The cereal also is made for "ease of assimilation"... what is this, the Borg?  I get it, Borg breakfast cereal because it's easy to assimilate.   Of course the Fat Nazis have plagued us in modern times with their incessant battle cry of  "Eat less fat!!"  So I have just plain milk in my cereal (ok I cheat, I use 2% and if the Fat Nazis take umbridge with it they can shove a spoon up their nose).  Where was I? Oh yes back then in the halcyon era of "eat whatever you wanted", the suggestion is to serve the cereal with "Rich Milk, Cream or Half and Half".  I love it!

Would you eat this? It's in the food you eat every day!

Quaker still makes puffed rice and wheat today although it's not just puffed wheat anymore.  The FDA nanny state has seen fit to tell us we're not getting enough iron and b vitamins in our diet so all cereals are doctored with these compounds.  In the case of iron it's Ferrous Sulphate pictured on the left.  Yeah lovely green stuff isn't it?  Also known as Copperas it was the main ingredient in poor quality absinthe at the turn of the century and is one of the compounds attributed to "Absinthe Madness".  Fantastic! And now it's in our breakfast cereal.  Just one of the reasons I grow my own food.

Tweet